Tim Vine took time out from his successful "The Punslinger Tour" on Friday to make a one off appearance at the Bloomsbury Theatre, London, to record his new DVD. Entitled "So I said to this bloke..." the audience were treated to 85 minutes of quick fire pun related jokes and sight gags in his inimitable style. For those of you not familiar with Mr. Vine here is a quick biography, courtesy of Wikipedia.

Tim Vine's stand-up act consists primarily of a series of quick-fire one-liners and puns. On 7th October 2004 Vine broke the Guinness World Record for the most jokes told in an hour with 499, beating the previous record of 362. Each joke told by Vine had to get a laugh from the paying audience to count toward the record. He held the record until May 2005. Vine has taken his comedy act on a tour of the United Kingdom, most recently in his February 2006 tour entitled "Current Puns". His new tour "Punslinger" with all-new material started on April 28th 2008 and will take Tim all around the UK. See tour dates on timvine.com

In an age were comedians are either politically cynical or obsessed with pushing the boundaries of what is acceptable, Tim Vine simply embraces the daft, bizarre and the countries love affair with linguistic word play. The puns are often so contrived you can see them coming a mile off. But they are delivered with such sincerity and earnestness, that the whole act is hard to resist. If you like "Monty Python", "The Goons" or the monologues of Ronnie Barker, you'll see where Tim Vine's inspiration comes from. It's an act you need to experience to fully appreciate, as it's difficult to verbally extol the virtues of such acts as pen behind the ear, or flag Hippo.

It's refreshing to see that the success of mainstream sitcom "Not going Out" has not deterred Mr. Vine from pursuing his comic roots. The DVD should be out in October in the UK, and until then I would whole heartedly recommend his first offering "Tim Vine Live". For those still none the wiser, here are a selection of his rapid fire gags. Enjoy.

Now, most dentist's chairs go up and down, don't they? The one I was in went back and forwards. I thought, "This is unusual". Then the dentist said to me, "Mr Vine, get out of the filing cabinet".

I was reading this book, 'The History of Glue'. I couldn't put it down.

I got a job as the Duke of Edinburgh's hairdresser. The other day I parked outside Buckingham Palace and a policeman came up to me and said "have you got a permit?" And I said, "no, I've just got to take a bit off the back".

The other day someone left a piece of plasticine in my dressing room. I didn't know what to make of it.

Exit signs. They're on the way out, aren't they?

When I was at school people used to throw gold bars at me. I was the victim of bullion.

So I went to the doctor and he said, "You've got hypochondria." I said, "Not that as well!"

Velcro, what a rip-off...

I was playing the piano in a bar and this elephant walked in and started crying his heart out. I said "Do you recognise the tune?" He said "No, I recognise the ivory".

I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. I thought - he's trying to pull a fast one.

You invented Tippex... Correct me if I'm wrong.

I was in Tescos, and saw this man and woman wrapped in a bar code. I said "Are you two an item?".

A lorryload of tortoises crashed into a train full of terrapins. It was a turtle disaster.

I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags, he's bi-satchel.

I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself.

So I went in to a pet shop. I said, "Can I buy a goldfish?" The guy said, "Do you want an aquarium?" I said, "I don't care what star sign it is."

So I told my girlfriend I had a job in a bowling alley. She said "Tenpin?" I said, "No, it's a permanent job."

Advent Calenders, Their days are numbered.

So this bloke came up to me and said 'I've just dropped my scrabble set on the pavement'. I said 'Really? What's the word on the street?'

I went to a Party dressed as Sodium Chloride. Someone threw Hydrochloric Acid over me. I didn't know how to react.

At least it's comfortable on Eurostar. It's murder on the Orient Express.

I went down my local video store. I said "can I take out the elephant man?". He said he's not your type. I said "can I have Batman Forever?". He said you have to bring it back tomorrow. I said what about another 48 hours. He said tomorrow.

Its strange. You scream "Ahhhhhh" in a library and everyone hates you. You do the same on an aeroplane and everyone joins in.

I don't do jokes about the verb to jump out and scare people - that's To-boo.

So I took the M4 out of London, and someone said 'Put it back.'

A cowboy walks into a German car dealer and says "Audi!"

I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. And he said, 'no, the steaks are too high.'

XoD.